Showing posts with label future. Show all posts

Five Years of Lexi Likes

Lexi Likes is now five years old.

That’s five years of chronicling the evolution of me as a writer and me as a person. It's something in which I take great pride. I have spent almost a third of my existence writing Lexi Likes, with content ranging from my sweet fashion musings as a peppy thirteen year old to the hopefully more considered views on life and the challenges it poses for a young woman in this complex age.

I’m now at a crossroads. Like many of my peers, I’m transitioning from the relatively cosseted world of school to.…..well, I’m not quite sure. My future remains uncertain, as does everyone's with the shadow of results day hanging over Summer.

It’s has been long few months. Actually, it's been a long year. Upper Sixth, the final year of school in the UK, was tough. It's hard to anticipate until you are in it. Everyone seems to recall the agony of their final school year but it's not something you fully understand until you're doing it yourself. The exhaustion of the university application process, the lead up to A-levels plus the exams themselves, all mixed in with the antics that come with being young and trying to work out exactly where in this world you want to be.

Sound angsty? It was.


I'd like to think I held myself together pretty well but I'm also not afraid to admit that I got hit by a few curve balls. While this was the year I strengthened my most valuable friendships and had many good times, it's also probably been the hardest year of my life. The simple yet deeply disorientating lesson is that not everything in life goes to plan. I've learnt I do not respond well to the surrendering of control. I've learnt what it feels like to want something with all of your heart and not get it. I’ve learnt to deal with burning disappointment. I’ve learnt that the measure of a person is how they move forward after taking a big hit. I've learnt that A-levels are bloody hard. I've learnt many things and, tough as some of those lessons have been, I am probably stronger for it.


During this year, the last six months in particular, my focus shifted to my studies. My blog took a backseat and the content I produced concentrated on my thoughts during this turbulent time. While it was an accidental product of the shift in my lifestyle, I'm actually proud of some of the pieces that came out of it.

Despite all the trials and tribulations of this last year and the disappointments that have come with it, one thing I know is that I feel confident calling myself a writer. In the ever-changing digital age, you can waste a lot of time trying to label your digital identity - blogger, writer, influencer, journalist. But storytelling, and writing more specifically, is what I do. When the travelling stopped; the party invitations were declined; when the theatre trips and art exhibitions were replaced by study and revision; when the personal style consisted of a rotation of three pairs of trackies and old T-shirts; writing was still there. And regardless of career or future, it always will be.


Here are some highlights of the last five years.


1. My first post. Short but sweet.


2. Outside a show at my first season of London Fashion Week


3. My first commission, where I designed an outfit for a doll company


4. Getting featured in Teen Vogue


5. A double page spread in a French magazine about my life in London as a blogger



6. Speaking to the marketing director of Lad Bible as a CNN intern at a media conference



7. Listed in The Tab's '25 Most Successful Fashion Bloggers Under 25'



..to name a few.


I also want to thank you. Many of you have been here since the beginning, and may remember some of those moments. It's crazy to think I've been blogging for five years but what's even wilder is realising how many of you have been along for the ride. As my life moves into a new phase, I'm actively considering where to take this blog. As I evolve as a writer, a storyteller, so will the content of Lexi Likes. I hope that you will stay with me. 




I’m only just getting started.


-LEXI


Riding the Wave

Many of my blog posts over the last two years have been about the uncertainty of my future. I've written about how it's frightening and exciting in equal measure to not know what is next. I've reflected on the past while waiting for the future path to become clear. All of this was written in the knowledge - in the hope - that by the beginning of April, I would know what I'm doing next. 

Plot twist - I don't.

Perhaps naively, I assumed the vast majority of people would apply to university, end up with the school they wanted, get the grades and start in September. I assumed for most people, me included, much of the uncertainty would be over by now. It clearly happens for some people but what I’ve learned is that they are the very fortunate minority. 

For most people, it is not linear. There are setbacks, rejections, choices to be made. Gap years are increasingly common - not always a vehicle for travel but one for reapplying and figuring things out. People 'settle' for their second or third or fourth choices and end up loving it. Some go to their dream school hate it. There are so many variables out of our control that predictions are fraught with risk. But the uncertainty is part of the process.  

I'm also starting to realise that this is what the rest of life is going to be like. We've been spoilt by the linear security of school, always knowing what is ahead of us. Life isn't like that. Stepping out of that rigid structure feels like stepping into a void. 

Over the past few months, I've been dealt a few unexpected cards. I had the fantasy of my future mapped out in minute detail. But the cards I’ve drawn means I need to rethink. Dealing with rejection, and the closing of a door - even if it is just temporarily - has been harder than I could have imagined. I thought that university decisions, whether the verdict was good or bad, would bring clarity. At least I would know all of my options. At least I would be able to make a choice based on reality instead of hypothetical scenarios. Once again, I was wrong. Having heard back from all my universities, I'm actually faced with different choices and I remain confused. 

So, how do the unlucky majority deal with the process of uncertainty? As we watch our peers cruise through to their top choices, barely breaking a sweat, how do we deal with not knowing? 



We ride the wave. 

New York inspired playlist

New York city is my favourite place in the world. There's a certain drive in New York. Everyone has an ambition, and choose this jungle of brick and glass as their ground on which to build their dream. It sounds incredibly cliché I know, but the fact that it is so cliché proves that it's true. The magical kingdom of concrete is made for a certain type of person and I believe I am one of them. One day I will live there, preferably in Soho but I'm not fussy (I mean its New York, dump me on the street and I'll be happy). 


From my previous trips I have distinct memories and associations that take me back to the city. Among these are watching Hannah Montanna for the first time (as a Disney-deprived nine year old this was beyond exciting), discovering the genius invention that is iced coffee, Frank Sinatra's beautiful voice, clean white hotel beds, Carrie Bradshaw, Breakfast at Tiffany's and the classic Manhattan cityscapes. Unfortunately, until the city gets cheaper I am unable to run away from my responsibilities at home (that's how it works right?). So I decided to create a New York inspired playlist. The eclectic mix was created for the future, when I'm all grown up and packing my bags, dreaming of the city that never sleeps.




Any further song suggestions would be much appreciated.

-Lexi xo